Take solace, I've now worked for some of the largest fortune 10 companies, subbed for some of the biggest/coolest contracting firms, worked for hot VC funded startups, worked for mid-term enterprises and started my own contracting firm.
Everyone is running by the seat of their pants and totally faking it. Everyone has weird jank they can't fix. Everyone has inertia they can't change course on.
Stop caring what others think. Care what you think. And work on thinking about the right things.
Q: Whats the right thing?
A: You'll know it when you see it. If you work to unwind the shit you were indoctrinated into, and start to read a ton of books you'll know.
- if its not consistent, ie doesn't practice what it preaches, its worth a rethink.
- if the smartest most "out there" and/or creative types aren't into it, then there is a good chance its likely worth a rethink.
Merveilles is a community project aimed at the establishment of new ways of speaking, seeing and organizing information — A culture that seeks augmentation through the arts of engineering and design. A warm welcome to any like-minded people who feel these ideals resonate with them.